Our desire as a church is to have strong marriages and we think if we have healthy sex lives in our marriages it will lead to strong marriages. Maybe talking about your sex life is a normal every day experience for you as a couple…great! Sometimes couples won’t talk about these kinds of things because they feel embarrassed, don’t want to hurt feelings, not sure where to start, so we want to help open some lines of communication to get the ball rolling. Consider this a starting point:
Biblical Understanding of Sexuality
Our sexuality is one of those topics that people don’t like to talk about. People will talk about it socially, medically, scientifically, but we tend not to talk about it in our marriages and especially in the church. As a result we are left with a completely negative connotation. If we avoid talking about it we will ultimately create our own conclusions and instead of creating our own conclusions we want to look to Scripture.
Are you convinced of your sin?
30 The Pharisees and their scribes began grumbling at His disciples, saying, “Why do you eat and drink with the tax collectors and sinners?” 31 And Jesus answered and said to them, “It is not those who are well who need a physician, but those who are sick.
There are a couple of observations we can make about this passage. The first is how the Pharisees respond. The Pharisees are the religious leaders of the day and they respond how we might think Jesus would have responded. “Grumbling, complaining annoyed, eating and drinking with sinners.” They had just seen him heal the sick, cure the diseased, and then claim to forgive sins, which are all claims of His deity, and yet now Jesus is sitting with tax collectors. Who does Jesus think He is?
Jesus didn’t claim to be a good person, a good teacher, a prophet, or a religious leader, but God who comes and walks among the lowliest of low and brings a message of forgiveness and purpose. This was completely different than what the religious leaders expected. It was completely different than merely adding religious behavior.
Finding Romance
When you first meet someone it seems that romance is naturally in the air. So excited to be on a date, hold hands, get to know one another, but sometimes romance can start to fade.
Below are a few points of application to keep the romance alive in your marriage:
Relationship With Jesus: We have to have a relationship with Jesus if we are going to make it in marriage. Until Jesus is central it is going to be an uphill climb. You have two people going in two different directions. We need to start with a relationship with Jesus.
Avoiding Self-sufficiency
Before we even start we need to do examine any task, challenge, or responsibility and be assured that it lines up with Scripture. If it doesn’t show up in Scripture then it doesn’t matter.
First Response: We pray. Most of the time we see something in scripture we are filled with a variety of feelings. We might feel excited, anxious, fearful, doubt, and we might feel our heart race a little faster. We start thinking, “What if I do it wrong, what if I mess up, what if other people do better than me?” Our mind and heart starts racing and that is why we need to pray. We take those thoughts and feelings to Jesus. Involve Jesus in the conversation as quick as possible. Go to Him with our fear, our anxiety, our doubts, maybe frustrations, or even anger.
Self-sufficiency
Self-sufficiency is something that is really sneaky that can creep into our spiritual lives before we even see it coming. It is really sneaky, really subtle, and it could stop us before we start. Typically it will reveal itself in 1 of 2 ways:
Arrogance: We look within ourselves and conclude we can do it. We can get it done. Our childhood idol was G.I. Joe and we can make it happen!
Discouragement: We look within and conclude it is impossible. We can’t do this. Our childhood idol was Eeyor and we are going to mess it up.
Both of those responses are an attack against the gospel because it is looking within and based on our resources determining if we can do something or not. That isn’t the gospel. It isn’t our self-sufficiency that gets us to Jesus and it isn’t our self-sufficiency that keeps us with Jesus. Here are some other characteristics of self-sufficiency:
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Nehemiah’s Response
Being involved in the lives of other people isn’t a new concept. It is something God has intended from the very beginning. In the Old Testament there is a an example of Nehemiah who has found himself living in a foreign land, working for a foreign king, and living a very comfortable lifestyle as a cupbearer.
This is written at a time in Israel’s history where their land, homes, and people have been devastated, destroyed, and in verse Hanani (vs. 2) returns from seeing the devastation and informs Nehemiah of their pain.
1 The words of Nehemiah the son of Hacaliah Now it happened in the month Chislev, in the twentieth year, while I was in Susa the capitol, (the capital of Persia) 2 that Hanani, one of my brothers, and some men from Judah came; and I asked them concerning the Jews who had escaped and had survived the captivity, and about Jerusalem. 3 They said to me, “The remnant there in the province who survived the captivity are in great distress and reproach, and the wall of Jerusalem is broken down and its gates are burned with fire.”
Nehemiah is just a regular guy and this letter is basically his journal and in verse 3 it tells us the physical condition of Jerusalem and the people. They are in distress, scared, they are in a crisis, and the wall of Jerusalem is broken down and gates burned with fire. There is a lack of safety and visually the gates are burned and it reminds them of the pain and loss they have experienced as a people. People have either died, been taken, or ran in fear and look at how Nehemiah responds in verse 4.
3.2.1
One of our goals as a church is that we would be a people who Connect With Others. To help us accomplish this goal we created little cards to challenge and encourage one another.
3 People To Pray For: The first number is 3 and we thought if as a church we were all taking the initiative to pray for 3 people that would be a really powerful experience for our church. It can be a neighbor, it can be a co-worker, a family member, but somebody that you are going to go to battle for spiritually. You notice it doesn’t say when or how often you are going to pray for those people, but it’s our desire that this would be something you keep in your Bible, your purse, your wallet, tape it on your steering wheel as a reminder to pray for others.
Our Strategy As A Church?
When it comes to starting a church today in the United States 95% of them do so with a traditional promotional marketing strategy. Which means they come into an area, study the demographics, and market their church accordingly, just like any business would market its self.
When I speak to other new churches they tell me they spend $30-50K on marketing. They send mailers, door hangers, billboards, radio spots, magazine ads, and they come into a community and blitz the community with marketing. There is nothing wrong with marketing, but if our focus is a traditional marketing strategy it will create two road blocks:
• Not Effective: In North Central Austin we called all the churches in a 2-mile radius and of the 200,000 people living in the area less than 10,000 of them are connected to a local church. Many of them have had negative experiences, many of them are jaded, have been hurt, and a door hanger isn’t able to overcome those past experiences. There will be a few, but in our context, it typically won’t work. We have done some traditional marketing, but less than $2K.
• Not Reproducible: The second is that strategy isn’t reproducible for the average Christ follower. The average person isn’t going to call up KISS FM and purchase a radio spot for our church. As a result, the traditional marketing strategy removes the Christ follower from the equation and it isn’t reproducible.
So “What is our marketing strategy?”
What makes you look pretty?
I have a 5 year old daughter and she is beautiful. This morning she put on one of her dresses that we got her for Christmas. It is a summer dress, but sometimes dresses are so pretty you just can’t wait until the summer. All you have to do to turn a summer dress into a winter dress is add a long sleeve turtle neck and thick leggings and lickety-split, your summer dress becomes a winter dress! And to be fair she is a girly girl who will do anything to wear dresses.
With her new dress on, turtle neck pulled up, and leggings tight she quickly asked me, “Daddy don’t I look pretty in my new dress?” Of course you do I replied. You are beautiful. I walked across the room to her, kneeled down beside her and said, “But it isn’t your dress that makes you pretty.” Do you know what it is? “My body”, she replied. A little caught of guard to hear a little 5 year old girl already so aware of her appearances I said, “No, not your body. Do you know what it is?” She said simply, “No.” I said it’s not your dress, your body, or your hair, but it is your sweet, sweet heart that makes you pretty.
Her face lit up with a smile and she wrapped her arms around my neck really tight. I asked her, “Do you know why its your heart that makes you pretty?”
Last year with the kids…
Here is a quick video to capture the last year with the kids. Enjoy!
NVC Celebration
Here is a quick snapshot of the last 3 months. It has been fun!
Holidays
Holidays are a great time to connect with family and create some memories. Sure there is some stress, but it is a key time in the family to create traditions and connections with friends and family.
This is a picture from a family outing we had recently. Be sure to take some time around the holidays to create some memories!
A Season Of Hope
Last week I was at Schlotzky’s and I heard this lady next to me talking about her Thanksgiving and she said, ”We spent it with our friends and it was so much fun, because it was with all the people we wanted to be with.”
Sometimes family can make the holidays a little noisy. In every family it is inevitable that there are different expectations around the holidays. Yet, even with all the chaos from traveling, and attending parties, I wish there were a dozen days throughout the year that we would celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ because it is a time when we are reminded of a tremendous amount of hope that is provided to all of humanity.
In Micah 5 we see a clearer picture of this hope:
How did they miss it?
In Matthew 2 it becomes obvious people knew Jesus was going to fulfill the over 300 descriptions of the promised messiah in the Old Testament.
1 Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, magi from the east arrived in Jerusalem, saying, 2 “Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we saw His star in the east and have come to worship Him.” 3 When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, (Why?, there is a new king) and all Jerusalem with him. 4 Gathering together all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Messiah was to be born. 5 They said to him, “In Bethlehem of Judea; for this is what has been written by the prophet: 6 ‘AND YOU, BETHLEHEM, LAND OF JUDAH, ARE BY NO MEANS LEAST AMONG THE LEADERS OF JUDAH; FOR OUT OF YOU SHALL COME FORTH A RULER WHO WILL SHEPHERD MY PEOPLE ISRAEL.'”
The chief priests, the scribes, the magi, Herod the king, all knew Jesus was fulfilling the promise of a coming messiah. Later on in Matthew 2 King Herod even issues a decree to have all children 2 years and under in Bethlehem killed because he knew the promises had been fulfilled in Jesus. A new king was coming!
So how did they miss it?