Tag Archives: north central austin

The Longing to be Known

There is something in us that wants to be seen, known and understood. We want someone who notices when something is wrong before we have to explain it. The comfortable feeling of not having to try to impress others. And, the longing for someone to understand our quirks.  A person who has seen our worst, and somehow still wants to be around us.

Isn’t that one of the things we love about a great friendship or marriage? And yet, at the same time, we spend an incredible amount of energy making sure people don’t know too much about us. 

We tend to tell the parts of our story that make us look the way we want others to see us. When people ask, “How are you doing?” We give generic answers like, “Great!” Honestly, who knows if we’re great. It doesn’t matter. It’s just this tension inside of us wanting to be known and at the same time keeping people at a distance.

WE WERE CREATED TO BE KNOWN

The opening chapters of Genesis describe something that is almost difficult for us to imagine. Genesis 2:25 says:

“And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Obviously, the verse is describing physical nakedness, but there’s something bigger happening. It’s a relationship where there is nothing to hide. A relationship without shame or pretending. No wondering, “If you knew this about me, would you still love me?” They are completely exposed and completely safe.

That’s the kind of relationship humanity was created to experience, one with God and with others. But then Genesis 3 enters into the story. Humanity decides we want God’s creation without God’s authority. Adam and Eve reject God, and sin fractures everything God created to be good.

AND THEN WE START HIDING

Immediately after Adam and Eve eat the fruit, Genesis says: “Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked.” And what do they do? They cover themselves with fig leaves. Then when they hear God walking in the garden, they hide.

Before sin, naked and unashamed. After sin, cover and hide. Nothing about the human body changed between Genesis 2 and Genesis 3, but something changed inside of them. For the first time, humanity experiences shame and fear, and we’ve been covering ourselves ever since. 

Today, we just have better fig leaves. We can cover ourselves with success, romance, money, accomplishment, or even the image we present to other people. Shopping and entertainment can become ways to distract ourselves from things we’d rather not face.

Even religion can become a modern-day fig leaf. We can learn to say the right things, make the right choices, and present ourselves in a way that keeps anyone from looking too closely. The fig leaves have changed, but the instinct hasn’t. We still want to cover the parts of ourselves we’re afraid for others to see.

AND THEN GOD SHOWS UP

One of my favorite moments in Genesis 3 happens immediately after Adam and Eve hide. God calls out to Adam: “Where are you?” Obviously, God isn’t wandering around the garden wondering where Adam went. He knows. That’s what makes the question so powerful. Adam is hiding from Someone who already knows where he is, and God still moves toward him.

This is why Jesus is so important. When Jesus arrives, He knows our souls are longing to be known. In John 4, Jesus meets a woman at a well. She has a complicated story. Jesus knows it. He knows about her past. He knows the parts of her story she probably wouldn’t lead with when meeting someone new. And yet Jesus sits down and talks with her.

That’s what makes Jesus so different. Most of us think: If you really knew me, you might not love me. Jesus reverses that fear. He already knows us, and He moves toward us anyway. There is nothing we’re going to confess that causes Jesus to say: “Wait. You did what?” Jesus knows the parts of our story we’ve worked really hard to keep hidden. And He still went to the cross for us.

TO BE FULLY KNOWN

Maybe that’s why we want someone to really know us? We were created for a kind of relationship where we could be completely known without hiding. Sin made us afraid of that.

So, now we spend our lives looking for people who will know us while simultaneously making sure they don’t know too much. But Jesus offers something different. He doesn’t ask us to convince Him that we’re doing great. He already knows how we’re doing! He knows when we’re afraid. He knows we’re faking and really ashamed. He knows when we are trying to keep areas of our life covered up. And He hasn’t moved away. 

In fact, He’s moving toward us right now. It’s because the thing we’ve been looking for all along isn’t someone who thinks we’re impressive. It’s someone who knows exactly who we are and still says: “Come to Me.”

Finding Community in a City Full of People

If you live around The Domain, you probably don’t have to go very far to be around people. You can walk through The Domain on a Saturday night and pass hundreds of people between restaurants, apartments, coffee shops, stores, and sidewalks. 

You can live in an apartment building with people above you, below you, and across the hall, and still not know their names, so that Austin is full of people. But being around people isn’t the same thing as being known by people.

The Local Church

The same thing can happen at a local church. You can show up on Sunday, worship, listen to a message, grab some coffee, and head home without ever really finding your place. That’s one of the reasons serving on a Sunday morning can be so important.

It might look like you’re giving up precious hours that can be used for other areas of your life that need attention, but something else happens when you start showing up for other people: you start becoming part of a community.

Sometimes taking steps to grow spiritually starts with saying yes to a serving opportunity. It is taking a step of ownership in your faith that says, “This isn’t an observational experience. This is a personal investment in an area of my life that is important.”

Most people don’t start serving because they feel passionate about a specific area. In fact, one volunteer described being intimidated when she first started working with children because she was afraid she might say the wrong thing. But then she discovered something freeing: it’s okay not to know everything. She didn’t have to be an expert. She simply needed to be willing to show up, learn, and care about the kids in front of her.

Over time, something started to change. The children began recognizing her with smiles in the hallways. Parents began to engage her more naturally. She shared common experiences with other volunteers. Faces she might have passed with a polite “Good morning” on Sunday mornings became people she knew.

Serving once a month in a particular area didn’t just give her something to do. It gave her people to know, so that there is a difference between attending a worship service on a Sunday morning and being known.

That’s especially meaningful in a city like Austin. People move here for work. Young adults relocate for jobs with companies around The Domain and North Austin. Families arrive without extended family nearby, so that it’s easy for people to build a life here surprisingly quickly while taking much longer to build meaningful relationships.

Church can accidentally become another place we consume as another task to accomplish throughout the week. We find a service we like. We sit in a familiar section. We listen to a message we enjoy. And, we leave, only to get discouraged over time because we don’t feel like we are growing. But the church was never intended to simply be a crowd of people attending the same location at the same time. The local church at her heart is a family. And families know one another.

One technical volunteer described how serving changed his experience of worship: it wasn’t just about what he got out of Sunday morning but what he was able to offer on Sunday morning.

Counting the Cost

Of course, serving costs something. There will be Sundays when you’d rather sleep longer. Sundays when brunch sounds better. Sundays when you arrive at church and think, I really don’t want to do this today. That’s natural!

But serving others doesn’t something to our soul. It reminds us, even briefly, about the needs of others. In that moment, we stop thinking only about what we need and start noticing the people God has placed around us.

And in a city that constantly invites us to ask, “What do I want to do today?”, following Jesus invites us to ask a different question: “Who can I serve today?”  We don’t have to serve the whole city. We don’t have to know everyone at church. We don’t even have to feel particularly gifted. Maybe we just start with one yes? Maybe it starts with learning someone’s name? Maybe it starts with sharing a little of your story? And somewhere along the way, you may discover that you didn’t just find a place to serve. You found a place to belong.