Tag Archives: hope

The Longing to be Known

There is something in us that wants to be seen, known and understood. We want someone who notices when something is wrong before we have to explain it. The comfortable feeling of not having to try to impress others. And, the longing for someone to understand our quirks.  A person who has seen our worst, and somehow still wants to be around us.

Isn’t that one of the things we love about a great friendship or marriage? And yet, at the same time, we spend an incredible amount of energy making sure people don’t know too much about us. 

We tend to tell the parts of our story that make us look the way we want others to see us. When people ask, “How are you doing?” We give generic answers like, “Great!” Honestly, who knows if we’re great. It doesn’t matter. It’s just this tension inside of us wanting to be known and at the same time keeping people at a distance.

WE WERE CREATED TO BE KNOWN

The opening chapters of Genesis describe something that is almost difficult for us to imagine. Genesis 2:25 says:

“And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

Obviously, the verse is describing physical nakedness, but there’s something bigger happening. It’s a relationship where there is nothing to hide. A relationship without shame or pretending. No wondering, “If you knew this about me, would you still love me?” They are completely exposed and completely safe.

That’s the kind of relationship humanity was created to experience, one with God and with others. But then Genesis 3 enters into the story. Humanity decides we want God’s creation without God’s authority. Adam and Eve reject God, and sin fractures everything God created to be good.

AND THEN WE START HIDING

Immediately after Adam and Eve eat the fruit, Genesis says: “Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked.” And what do they do? They cover themselves with fig leaves. Then when they hear God walking in the garden, they hide.

Before sin, naked and unashamed. After sin, cover and hide. Nothing about the human body changed between Genesis 2 and Genesis 3, but something changed inside of them. For the first time, humanity experiences shame and fear, and we’ve been covering ourselves ever since. 

Today, we just have better fig leaves. We can cover ourselves with success, romance, money, accomplishment, or even the image we present to other people. Shopping and entertainment can become ways to distract ourselves from things we’d rather not face.

Even religion can become a modern-day fig leaf. We can learn to say the right things, make the right choices, and present ourselves in a way that keeps anyone from looking too closely. The fig leaves have changed, but the instinct hasn’t. We still want to cover the parts of ourselves we’re afraid for others to see.

AND THEN GOD SHOWS UP

One of my favorite moments in Genesis 3 happens immediately after Adam and Eve hide. God calls out to Adam: “Where are you?” Obviously, God isn’t wandering around the garden wondering where Adam went. He knows. That’s what makes the question so powerful. Adam is hiding from Someone who already knows where he is, and God still moves toward him.

This is why Jesus is so important. When Jesus arrives, He knows our souls are longing to be known. In John 4, Jesus meets a woman at a well. She has a complicated story. Jesus knows it. He knows about her past. He knows the parts of her story she probably wouldn’t lead with when meeting someone new. And yet Jesus sits down and talks with her.

That’s what makes Jesus so different. Most of us think: If you really knew me, you might not love me. Jesus reverses that fear. He already knows us, and He moves toward us anyway. There is nothing we’re going to confess that causes Jesus to say: “Wait. You did what?” Jesus knows the parts of our story we’ve worked really hard to keep hidden. And He still went to the cross for us.

TO BE FULLY KNOWN

Maybe that’s why we want someone to really know us? We were created for a kind of relationship where we could be completely known without hiding. Sin made us afraid of that.

So, now we spend our lives looking for people who will know us while simultaneously making sure they don’t know too much. But Jesus offers something different. He doesn’t ask us to convince Him that we’re doing great. He already knows how we’re doing! He knows when we’re afraid. He knows we’re faking and really ashamed. He knows when we are trying to keep areas of our life covered up. And He hasn’t moved away. 

In fact, He’s moving toward us right now. It’s because the thing we’ve been looking for all along isn’t someone who thinks we’re impressive. It’s someone who knows exactly who we are and still says: “Come to Me.”

What We Love About Nostalgia

Have you had those moments when you hear a song we haven’t heard in 20 years and suddenly we’re back in high school? What about when you drive through an old neighborhood and slow down to look at the house where we grew up? We love nostalgia!

We love to pull out pictures from when our children were little and wonder where all the time went. There are things we say like, “Those were the good old days!” Or, we somehow look back on those days and only remember the sweet moments? There is something strange about the way human beings think about going back to a time when life was simpler.

What is it about home or a previous time in life that pulls on us? Surely, our longing for home is about more than a house or a city. Doesn’t it feel like somewhere deep within the human experience is a longing to return to a time where everything was familiar?

WE WERE CREATED WITH A HOME

The opening chapters of Genesis describe humanity at home. Adam and Eve are in a garden created by God. It’s in those pages we see meaningful work. They have everything they need. In fact, Scripture says they were “naked and unashamed.” Sounds like a good time!

We don’t see people worrying about bills or making up stories to impress their friends. There’s nobody visiting the hospital or counting calories. In fact, we don’t even see conversations about those things because everything is perfect. They are home.

But then Genesis 3 happens. Humanity decides we want God’s creation without God’s authority. Adam and Eve reject God, and sin fractures everything God created to be good. By the end of Genesis 3, God sends Adam and Eve out of the garden. Genesis says:

“Therefore the LORD God sent him out from the garden of Eden…”

And then the language gets even stronger:

“He drove out the man…”

God places cherubim and a flaming sword at the entrance, guarding the way to the tree of life. Adam and Eve can’t just turn around and go back, so that from that point forward humanity has lost its home.

WE KEEP TRYING TO GO BACK

I am sure there are some people who will be dismissive to those words in Genesis because the Bible is supposed to be outdated, archaic, and unable to relate to the challenges of modern people today, but we can’t deny the inner desire we have to go back. 

We love movies like Back to the Future. They resonate with our souls, because we love the possibility of being to go back. We love the idea of watching movies about history, and we love thinking about our friends from childhood and wondering, “What ever happened to so and so?”

Twenty-One Pilots has a hit song called “Stressed Out” and in the song there is a lyric that says:

Wish we could turn back time to the good old days
When our mama sang us to sleep, but now we’re stressed out
Used to play pretend, give each other different names
We would build a rocket ship, and then we’d fly it far away
Used to dream of outer space, but now they’re laughin’ at our face
Sayin’, “Wake up, you need to make money, ” yeah

Is it just people overwhelmed by stress? Maybe? But all those moments will allow us to remember a part of our story, but those memories never actually take us home. Maybe it’s because what we’re longing for isn’t really the old house, the old neighborhood, or the simpler season? Maybe we’re longing for what those things represent?

Skyler Grey wrote a song called, “Coming Home.”  In the song there are lyrics of wanting to go home to a place that was familiar and safe. It was a part of life where one would find rest and belonging.

A place where everything and everyone we love is finally where they’re supposed to be. And no matter how hard we try, we can’t quite get there, but Genesis 3 tells us why. It’s because we’re all living east of Eden.

HOME ISN’T JUST A PLACE

There’s also another problem. Even if we could somehow recreate everything exactly the way it used to be, it still wouldn’t completely satisfy us. Because the deepest loss in Genesis 3 wasn’t a garden or a location. Our deepest loss is the presence of God.

Adam and Eve didn’t merely lose beautiful scenery. They were driven away from the place where they had experienced unhindered life with their Creator. That’s the exile underneath all our other exiles. And humanity has been trying to find its way home ever since.

We begin by chasing after that best friend, and for a season a best friend can be incredibly meaningful. But inevitably there’s going to be cracks and fractures in those friendships that leave us in a place of loss.  As we get older we will try to replicate those pursuits with romantic relationships, goals and career objectives, but again, each of those will be met with different challenges.

Studies show that millennials love experiences. They coined the phrase FOMO because they didn’t want to miss out anything life has to offer. There’s nothing wrong with chasing after experiences, but inevitably those experiences will always leave us chasing after another experience. Because if our deepest problem is separation from God, changing our address won’t solve it. 

AND THEN JESUS SHOWS UP

This is what makes the words of Jesus so interesting. In John 14, Jesus tells His disciples that He is going to prepare a place for them. Thomas responds with the question humanity has been asking since Genesis 3: “How can we know the way?” And Jesus answers: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.”

Think about that. Humanity has been driven from the garden. The way back is guarded. We can’t become moral, successful, or religious enough to get back. And then Jesus says: “I am the way.” He doesn’t simply give us directions home.

Jesus becomes the way home. Genesis 3 ends with humanity being sent away because of our sin. At the cross, Jesus takes our sin upon Himself. He experiences rejection, suffering, death, and cries out, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” In that moment, Jesus enters our exile so that exiles like us can be brought home.

The Way Home

The home we’re looking for isn’t our childhood house, or a memory of an easier part of life. We were created for life with God, and ever since Genesis 3 humanity has been trying to find its way home.

The next time an old song takes you back, or you drive through the old neighborhood and wish you could have that moment one more time, don’t be surprised by the ache. Maybe it’s a reminder that we were made to be at home with God? That’s the surprising hope of Jesus. We spend so much of our lives wishing we could go back, but Jesus doesn’t promise to take us backward. He promises to bring us home to the Father.

Getting Over Grumpiness: How to Stop Resenting Where You Are While Still Hoping for More

Everyone has a season of life where we start to feel grumpy: We want our marriage to feel closer, but every week feels like the same argument. We want our job to be meaningful, but Sunday night still feels like dread. We want our parenting to be calmer, but we keep losing our patience at the same places. And we end up living in this exhausting middle space: We hope things will get better, but it doesn’t feel like anything will actually change.

Most people don’t even know how to talk about this tension. They assume the frustration means something is wrong with them. Or they plataue into mediocrity, convincing themselves nothing will ever change.

But the real issue isn’t desire or effort, or Steve at work always talking about the best way to roast coffee beans for the 27th time. The real issue is how we hold the hope for change and the reality of where we are, without getting stuck in an eternal state of grumpiness.

It starts with being CONTENT so that we are able to find HOPE.

If a person is internally unsettled about an area of life, their hope isn’t really hope, it’s desperation. It’s a Hail Mary. It is in those moment that we rush decisions. We cling to an outcome that has to happen, or else! Of course we are filled with anxiety, because it all has to work together the way we want, when we want, and how we want.

In addition, taking steps toward being content with where we are in life of our career, marriage, health, finances, friends is the first step to accepting that we don’t need to change to be okay.

This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have goals in life. There’s nothing wrong with goals. It’s great to have dreams, but before we get to goals and dreams we want to combat the lie that says, “I will be okay when this or that happens in my life.”

The power of being content breaks that lie and says, “I am okay with who I am today, even if nothing ever changes.” Take a second just to consider the weight of that statement. Do you enjoy the person you are today? Do you enjoy the quality of your marriage, health, finances, children, and career today? If nothing ever changed in those areas, would you be content? If not, we will always set ourselves up for the “next big thing.”

When we are ready to accept where we are in life and who we are in life we are able to see hope enter into the story of our life. Now, after we’ve done the work of being content we can see that hope isn’t a condition for us to pursue, but instead, hope is simply fuel for us to enjoy the possibility of what might come in the days ahead.

HOPE isn’t mandatory of what HAS TO HAPPEN, but instead, hope is FUEL for what MIGHT HAPPEN!

Hope interpreted as a necessity becomes a weight that can feel like pressure, which creates anxiety. But if we start with contentment, then hope becomes empowering, not condemning. The sequence matters because your value as a person isn’t dependent on the results. You can dream about a brighter future but you’re not held hostage by that dream. Here are 5 principles to help us remember:

  1. Finding contentment with who we are and where we are removes the panic that something has to change. When we are panicked in life, then every conversation feels like an emergency.
  2. Finding contentment with who we are and where we are removes the frustration we have toward life. When it comes to our marriage, health, career, children, finances; we don’t have to hate where we are to build a better tomorrow.
  3. Finding contentment with who we are and where we are brings clarity, so that hope is given clearer direction. It is in those moments that we stop chasing cobwebs and go kill the spider!
  4. Finding contentment with who we are and where we are removes the pressure. As long as we feel “behind” as a person or in an area of life we are going to be fueled by outside circumstances. Instead, we want to release hope to be a preferred future that doesn’t have to happen.
  5. Finding contentment with who we are and where we are is accessible today. Nothing has to change. It’s totally perspective. It’s this transition that allows hope to shape a long-term process of growth.

At the end of the day, getting over grumpiness isn’t about pretending everything is fine or forcing yourself to feel optimistic. It’s about remembering that you can be grounded in who you are and where you are today, while still moving toward a better tomorrow.

Contentment gives you the peace to breathe again; hope gives you the courage to take the next step. And when those two work together, you stop waiting for life to change before you show up to it. You start living today with the freedom and clarity you thought only existed in the future.

How to Live This Today (Simple, Practical Application)

Step 1 — Name the area where you’re frustrated.

Marriage.
Career.
Health.
Finances.
Parenting.

Step 2 — Say this sentence out loud:

“I can be grounded and settled with who I am and where I am, even if nothing changes today.”

Step 3 — Identify ONE hopeful action.

  • One honest conversation.
  • One boundary.
  • One habit.
  • One budget move.
  • One apology.
  • One walk.
  • One resume sent.
  • One evening without your phone.

References to consider:

  1. Philippians 4: Peace and pursuit held together through contentment.
  2. Edwin Friedman, “A Failure of Nerve.”
  3. Dallas Willard, “Renovation of the Heart.”

Still Standing: A Night of Comedy + Life + Hope

The 5-Day Humor & Hope Challenge

Building Resilience One Laugh, One Story, One Step at a Time

Let’s be honest: life can feel like a roller coaster you didn’t want to ride.

Some of us are raising teenagers, losing loved ones, trying to keep marriages alive, or just trying to get the dog to stop chewing Amazon boxes. (Why is cardboard the forbidden fruit for a dog?)

As a pastor for 25 years, a husband for 26 years, and a dad to two grown children, I’ve learned the hard way that life isn’t about avoiding the storm. It’s about learning how to dance in it, and sometimes laugh so hard you forget it’s raining.

That’s why I created the 5-Day Humor & Hope Challenge, a simple rhythm of encouragement to help real people (like you and me) build resilience through laughter, faith, and small honest steps.

If you’re tired, burned out, or just looking for something to lighten the load, this is for you.

Day 1: Own Your Mess—Then Laugh!

Let’s stop pretending we’ve got it all together. That’s exhausting. The truth is, some of your best moments, the things that bond you to other people, are the stories you’re tempted to hide.

Like the time I had to walk my mom (who had schizophrenia and Alzheimer’s) into her facility because we couldn’t provide care for her at our house. It was horrible. It was one of those moments where you curl up on the couch in the fetal position.

There wasn’t much in life that prepared me for those days. But laughter helped carry me through it.

Scripture: “A cheerful heart is good medicine…” (Proverbs 17:22)
Action: Tell someone your funniest hard story this week. Let them laugh with you, not at you.

Day 2: Laugh WITH Your Spouse, Not AT Them

Marriage isn’t built on perfect communication or flawless date nights. It’s built on punchlines, patience, and being willing to forgive each other when you forget to cancel that Amazon order for the third time.

We’ve had seasons in our marriage where it felt like the only thing keeping us together was the mess—but laughing with your spouse is a real gift!

Scripture: “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (1 Corinthians 13:7)
Action: Think of one ridiculous memory that brought you closer. Text it to your spouse with a, “Can you believe we made it through that?”

Day 3: Give Grace to Your Family’s Weirdness

Every family is weird. Some are just better at hiding it.

But when you start giving grace instead of judgment, when you see your dad’s addiction or your mom’s mental illness through a lens of compassion, it opens the door for deeper healing and humor.

Resilience in families comes when we stop needing people to be perfect and start celebrating their progress.

Scripture: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)
Action: Say this prayer: “God, help me laugh more than I lecture today.” Then try it.

Day 4: Choose Hope When It Feels Optional

Hope isn’t passive, it’s practiced. It’s what you choose when you’ve buried people you love. It’s what you hold onto when you feel like giving up would be easier.

It’s not denial. It’s defiance against despair.

Scripture: “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.” (Hebrews 6:19)
Action: Write down one hard thing you’ve made it through. Title it: “I’m still standing.” That’s your reminder.

Day 5: Share What’s Real (Not Just What’s Right)

People aren’t looking for polished faith. They’re looking for honest hope.

You don’t have to be the expert. Just be someone who’s still in it. Still praying. Still messing up. Still laughing. Still standing.

Scripture: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)
Action: Call or message someone and say, “Can I tell you something real?” Then do it. That’s how light gets in.

Final Thought: You’re Not Failing—You’re Building Resilience

If you made it through this blog, guess what?
You’re doing better than you think.

You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to keep showing up, with a little more grace, a little more grit, and maybe a little more laughter.

And if you ever need someone to remind you that God still works through broken people with Costco outfits, I’m your guy.

Why Do We Sing the Song “Joy to the World?”

Joy to the world, the Savior reigns, let men their songs employ, while fields and floods, rocks, hills and plains, repeat the sounding joy, repeat the sounding joy, repeat, repeat the sounding joy

He rules the world with truth and grace, and makes the nations prove, the glories of His righteousness, and wonders of His love, and wonders of His love, and wonders and wonders of His, His love


Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

“Joy to the World” was written by Isaac Watts who was born in 1674 in Southampton, England.  He wrote over 750 hymns including, “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross, This is the Day the Lord Has Made, and Sin Has a Thousand Treacherous Arts.”  

Watts was actually bleeding edge in his time.  As a teenager he would always complain about the music and the lack of participation from the people.  So, his father challenged him to do something. The following week he wrote, “Behold the Glories of the Lamb” and the people began to engage in the worship as he involved an emotional and theological influence in the worship.  Isn’t that fascinating?

Today, “Joy to the World” is the most published Christmas song to date, but until we see the theological truths layered in the song I think we are missing out.  Let’s look at Romans 8 to see where this song comes from.  

Romans 8:18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

In the context of the passage, verse tells us there is new life in Jesus, there is victory in Jesus, there is freedom from sin, life-changing transformation that is glorious, but in verse 18 it also says, “There is suffering.”

It means there are people all over the world who are enjoying friends and family, having fun, enjoying rest and seeing God do great things in their life, but there are also some people all over the world who are suffering.  

How can we sing a song called “Joy to the World” when we are surrounded by suffering?  Verse 18 speaks of “glory that is to be revealed.”

This is why the song says, “Joy to the world, let earth receive her king, let heaven and nature sing, let men their songs employ, while fields and floods, rocks, hills and plains, repeat the sounding joy.”

This song isn’t just about fuzzy, warm moments around the holidays.  The song is about a baby that has come as king, lives a perfect life, takes all sin upon Himself, so that in Him, through faith, we are set free into the freedom of glory that will permeate every part of creation.  

But how does the hope of His glory lead to joy?  Imagine you are going to put two people in two rooms and give them identical tasks that are menial, boring, and difficult manual labor.  You tell them both, “You are going to work 40-hours a week, for 12-months, and no vacations.  It is going to be boring.  It is going to be tedious, and it is going to be really hard.  

To the first person you say, “At the end of the 12-months you will get an annual salary of $12,000.”  To the second person you say, “At the end of the 12-months you will get an annual salary of $12 Million.”

The first person is going to go at it for about 3-4 weeks and say, “I quit. This is too hard.  This is driving me crazy.”  But, the other person is going to say, “Done!  Not a problem, 12-months, are you kidding and whistling the whole day, every day, at work.”  Why?  The tedious trial is being overshadowed by the glory that is to be revealed.  

God’s Word teaches us, “We might get to live on this planet for 80+ years, and while we are here we will encounter suffering.  There are going to be hard days, but in verse 18 we see, “These hard days are nothing compared to the glory that is to be revealed.” 

Where is your joy?  Is it in romantic relationships that come and go?  Is your joy in the economy that is up and down?  Is your joy in how others perceive you?  What torture!

God’s Word invites us to put our joy in Jesus.  Jesus is the One who is full of power.  Jesus is the One who has come to call you His.  Jesus is the One who will return again to make all things new.  

This is why Isaac Watts writes down the words, “Joy to the World.”  It isn’t just what happens at the incarnation, it isn’t just the resurrection, it isn’t just the sanctification, but soon there is coming our glorification for the whole universe.  

Why Marriage Is Frustrating.

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Sometimes in our marriages we get so frustrated, however, if you look in Genesis 2 we see that God didn’t intend for marriage to be frustrating. He created it us to be in a loving relationships with one another, intimate, fruitful, naked, and unashamed, however, in Genesis 3 we see sin enter the equation and distort the relationship of marriage and sin brings frustration.

Specifically for the husband when God created Adam He created Him to cultivate and care for the garden. He had a job, a responsibility, and it was a divine responsibility of stewardship, however, when sin enters into humanity it results in frustration. Look at Genesis 3:17:

17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree about which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat from it’; Cursed is the ground because of you; in toil you will eat of it
all the days of your life. 18 “Both thorns and thistles it shall grow for you; And you will eat the plants of the field; 19 By the sweat of your face You will eat bread,
till you return to the ground, because from it you were taken; for you are dust,and to dust you shall return.”

Verse 17 starts off and sounds a little offensive, but who were Adam and Eve suppose to listen to? God. Yet, Eve listened to the serpent, and Adam listened to Eve and it resulted in disobedience. As verse 17 continues it explains that which was originally good has now become broken and distorted, and the land that was previously a blessing has now become difficult.

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